Baby Mama Drama

In yoga this morning my teacher started the class by talking about our edge and if you aren’t familiar with that term, it can be defined by the following:

Your edge is the point in the pose when you are mentally and physically challenged, but also able to find balance and ease. The edge embodies a calm challenge, exploring your limits, stepping away from your comfort zone, and cultivating awareness of your mind and body.

The concept of the “edge” has deep roots in yoga and is found across many styles, ranging from vigorous Ashtanga to the slower pace of Yin.

Anyways, midway through practice is about when she is taking us to our edge, the peak of the class where holds are longer, the heat is at its max and breath becomes challenged. All the sudden my phone starts ringing and it’s the childcare calling because my two-year-old has made herself vomit because she was crying so hard. So, I rolled up my mat and we left. Talk about an edge.

We joined our club in July of 2021 right after I quit my big girl corporate job. It was the dead of summer, and we needed a pool to go to and they have good childcare and kids programming so it was a no-brainer. In the beginning I just milled around on the fitness floor listening to my millennium playlists and just enjoyed a few minutes to myself and then as I explored more I started taking yoga classes. I have been doing yoga since high school but mostly in boutique-type settings, but the community here was super close-nit and non-judgmental. As months wore on I didn’t miss a day and then there were some when I was there morning and night because my head body and heart just needed it. The bottom line was most days that 1 hour was the only one I had to myself, and it was dire. So, imagine my frustration when after a year of visiting the gym daily, my toddler is still crying for me when I drop her off for an hour to play. I have no answers or advice for any of you parents out there going through the same or anything similar. Just holding some virtual space for you and here to tell you that this storm will pass, and you got this!

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My Story in Canadian Perinatal Mental Health Collaborative 2021

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Soul Sister